RIP Cuddle Monster

Ever since I was a baby, or so I am told anyway, I have loved to cuddle. I have always found soft touch to be very comforting and soothing. Having restless legs syndrome (RLS) has changed my ability to cuddle.

Lying still in bed has my RLS start to act up after a little bit. Of course, because I am trying to cuddle my husband, I start off with the smallest of movements in my repertoire of things to try to handle what's going on.

Movement and distractions while cuddling

Toes to the sky, toes to the bed, and repeat until either cuddling is done or RLS gets more aggravating. If it's more aggravated, then I start to include pointing my toes to the left and then pointing my toes to the right and increasing the movement speed. At this point, all the soothing and relaxation that cuddling had brought on is long gone.

I often wonder what my husband is thinking through all of this. I know it bothers him that I am in pain, and he can do nothing to stop it. All he is capable of doing is helping me through and/or distracting me from the pain. I very much adore that he loves to make me laugh and is very good at it.

I don't want to disturb my husband's sleep

I miss the days of being able to just lie comfortably in bed. When cuddling, the movements that I do are also the same movements I do when I'm trying to fall asleep at night. However, those movements are usually not enough, and I have to add in bending my legs halfway.

When it's just me in bed, that's fine, but more often than not, my husband is there with me and trying to fall asleep too. I always worry about my movements disrupting him even though he usually falls asleep pretty quickly. I wish I could fall asleep as quickly as he does; some nights, it's within 2 minutes that he is snoring.

Once he is snoring, then I am no longer worried about disturbing him because he's a heavy sleeper. There are times when my legs are so bad that my husband has had to help massage them before he falls asleep massaging my legs.

The pain drove me out of the bedroom

Before I started taking pramipexole and magnesium before bed, there were times when my RLS would be so bad when I was trying to sleep that I would actually have to get up and leave the bedroom.

In the living room, in the dark, I would do calf raises. Sometimes the pain would be so bad I would have to be awake for another hour and a half, sometimes 2 hours, until I would be exhausted enough that I would pass out despite how much my legs were bothering me. I absolutely do not miss those days at all.

Do you find RLS can make cuddling a challenge? Is RLS very bothersome before bed? Do you have any tricks/tips for coping?