RLS and Lost Love

As a child, I gravitated toward the classic love stories a lot — the likes of Romeo and Juliet (which is more of a tragedy, but still), Pride and Prejudice, Wuthering Heights, Little Women, and Anna Karenina, to name a few. Unlike the Harlequin and Mills and Boons love stories, the classics were more realistic to me and don't paint the picture of a perfect love, but a love that survives despite the odds.

Relationships can be complicated. It's even worse when there is an underlying reason that can potentially complicate it even further. Restless legs syndrome (RLS) falls into that category quite comfortably.

A movie date with restless legs

First, you meet them and everything seems great; then you get that pit in your stomach. You know you have to tell them you have restless legs syndrome. You can’t keep shooting down date ideas without a concrete reason, especially since they’re beginning to think you don’t like them.

But you do like them, a lot. So, one day, you garner the courage to tell them. They’re quiet as they drive you home from a movie date where you barely even watched the movie, as you kept excusing yourself because your legs were not having it.

Trying to explain RLS to a date

You can see that they’d never heard about restless legs syndrome in their entire life and are trying so hard not to say the wrong things. They stop, and you wonder why they’re stopping; then you realize you’re home.

You wonder if you should explain RLS to them but decide against it, giving them the chance to do their own research. You get out and wave goodbye, wondering if you’ll ever see them again.

You shake it off, skulk down your driveway, and hope for the best. You toss and turn all night; from RLS or anxiety? You can’t quite tell!

Finding a partner who is supportive

Your phone rings in the morning; your stomach sinks! From excitement or trepidation, you can’t quite tell. They tell you they looked it up and how sorry they are that you have to go through this. How they love you and will support you through this. You shed tears of joy. You have finally found your person, you think.

At first, things are fantastic; they are willing to do things that work for you and your condition. They are supportive and loving, and go out of their way to make you feel safe. They even sleep through the night in spite of all your movements.

Trouble maintaining relationships with RLS

Then the cracks start to show. It starts off with really mundane things that are barely noticeable. Then they start to complain about the things they want to do that you don’t want to do. They suddenly forget how restless legs syndrome inhibits you from doing certain things.

All of a sudden, you’re boring and no fun! They stop wanting to share a bed because your constant movement bothers them.

It goes on for weeks on end. Then, one day, you go into the shower and sob quietly. You know this is the beginning of the end. You know because they were not the first, but you were truly hoping they’d be the last.

Have you struggled to maintain romantic or intimate relationships because of your RLS? Share a story with us by clicking the button below.

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