Sleep-Waking: Some Things I Try With Sleep-Maintenance Insomnia

Lately, it has become a habit for me to fall asleep then wake up in the middle of the night for a while before going back to sleep.

I'm not by any means new to fractured sleep. I have fibromyalgia, so my sleep quality isn't exactly awesome. With my restless legs syndrome (RLS), though, even with treatment, because I'm such an insanely light sleeper, I will wake up when it gets aggravating. I will not be able to get back to sleep right away.

Sleep-maintenance insomnia

Apparently, there's a fancy new name for this form of insomnia. It's called sleep-maintenance insomnia. It's when you have difficulty staying asleep – something I'm very familiar with – but also have a hard time getting back to sleep.

Not being able to get back to sleep is a problem that began when my RLS became severe. Even when on medication. Sometime in the night, my medication would sort of weaken then BING - awake! And I would be up, antsy, unable to sleep. I would have to get up for another dose and then wait for it to kick in.

It has become a habit of mine. I think my brain is super trigger-happy with RLS sensations waking me up. It makes sense when symptoms are severe. Not so much when they're not.

What I know from my decades of insomnia

I learned some things about my insomnia. With fibromyalgia, I'm extremely familiar with delayed-onset insomnia, otherwise known as "I'll just clock-watch to see how many hours of sleep I may get for work," – and frequent wakings when I do manage to sleep.

I know how anxiety-inducing it can be. I know that sinking feeling of looking at the alarm clock and knowing I won't even get near enough sleep to function through work. I know the frustration. And then trying to "catch up on sleep" on the weekend, which doesn't work, but I was so exhausted I couldn't help it.

What I do when I can't get back to sleep

I learned things from doctors and just from my own experience that may help you if this is your habit too.

Stop clock watching

This can be an endless source of anxiety and stress. It forces you to worry about the next day and how much it will suck on little sleep.

Stop the spiraling thoughts of doom

This is fixated on not sleeping. Like you can just force yourself to sleep – like now. Okay, now. To turn my mind aside, what I used to do was just start daydreaming instead. And then I would lull myself asleep. Now with RLS, I try different things like relaxation breathing or meditation to see if I can relax my brain and fall back to sleep by ignoring the symptoms. Just because they woke me up doesn't mean they are as severe as when I went to bed. Annoying and aggravating, always. But not necessarily something I need to do anything about.

A quick mental fix

Sometimes, I need to get up simply because my body refuses to believe it can even get comfortable at all. So the quick mental fix is to get up for a very short period of time. Maybe go to the bathroom if you have to. Have a drink of water if you're in the mood. Take a little stroll about the house. Then go back to bed. For some reason, my brain is like, "Yes, now we can get comfortable." I think it's all the stress of trying to get back to sleep and tossing and turning. This sort of stops that whole process, resets everything, and then I can sometimes go back to sleep.

Get up and do something

You shouldn't spend too much awake time struggling to fall asleep and tossing and turning. I was always told, and followed, that after 20 minutes, if you can't sleep, get up and do something. Something relaxing or even boring. Not stimulating. When you feel sleepy, go back to bed. This is the point I'm at now. There's no reason to stress about it. I know for a fact if I stayed in bed, I'd be tossing and turning for hours. And my RLS symptoms would be driving me extra bonkers. If I'm up, I can take extra meds if needed. Or anything else that helps me. I distract myself with something really chill and just ease myself back into sleepy-sleepy time.

I don't do sleep well. I don't really get good quality sleep. Or even quantity. But I do know how to maximize what I do get.